How To Put Yourself Up For Adoption

This is a curious query. How do I put myself up for adoption? I’m definitely wondering why you have searched for this topic. But without going there, let’s look at whether it is even possible.

Let’s start here…

One of the initial considerations is how old you are. As an adult, you have significantly more freedoms when it comes to adoption. You might not realize this, but adult adoptions are actually a thing. This can be to formalize important relationships. Or, to make sure that property passes to the right people.

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An adoption creates concrete and difficult to change legal relationships. This is in addition to familial ones. If you are adopted by someone, in most cases, the legal ties you have to others will be cut. Your old family will be treated as if they never existed in the first place.

For example, let’s say you are adopted by a couple. Then, your birth mother dies after winning the lottery. You will not be eligible to inherit any of those millions. The same may be true if a grandparent of the former legal parent passes away.

The legal side of things is why adoption is a tricky business if you are the only one who wants the adoption to take place, especially if you are under the age of 18.

If everyone is on the same page about an adult adoption, the best place to get more information about starting that process is to talk to an attorney. Or contact your local court to see if there are any free forms or other resources. Each state is going to vary about the process.

Adoption if you are under 18

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The difficult part about adoption if you are under the age of 18 is that parents have legal rights tied to you. So in considering an adoption, not only are the legal rights of a child to the parents being severed. The inverse is true as well.

In every adoption, the parents’ rights to the child are severed. This can be done by consent, or it can be done over their objections by court order.

Essentially, if you are seeking to be adopted, you’ll have to be in a situation where the original rights of the parents can be severed, either voluntarily or through a termination proceeding.

If you are in the situation where the parents would voluntarily concede legal parental rights, the situation is much less complicated. If the parents are willing to give up their rights, the process would generally begin with finding suitable parents who want to adopt.

Now, keep in mind that there’s a ton of legal stuff involved in all of this, and this isn’t a legal blog, nor should you consider it a substitute for real legal advise in the state you live in.

Getting adopted into a new family over parents’ objections

There are very few (if any) contested adoptions. In most cases, by the time a child is adopted, all of the hurdles to the adoption have been overcome.

Generally, if an adoption occurs when the parents have objections, a proceeding occurs to terminate the rights of the parents first. In most cases, these proceedings are initiated by the state. Situations vary for when the state will step in. This depends upon the location, the resources of that particular government, the laws of that particular state, and the situation the family is in.

The state might step in to remove a child from a home and initiate the termination proceeding only in the most serious of circumstances. In the United States, the rights of a parent to his/her child are very strong. They are difficult to break.

(As they should be).

The state may get involved in families where parents neglect the children. They may also initiate a case if parents abuse the children, or bail out entirely. In most cases, parents will be given chances to improve themselves or the situation. However, no chances will be given if they have committed abuse or other horrendous acts against the children, or in front of them.

It’s important to note that being poor isn’t in itself a reason to remove children from a parent.

Things get especially sticky where an adoption is sought and one of the parents cannot be found.

“Putting yourself up” for adoption

You should know that there isn’t generally a place for you to “put yourself up for adoption” like Tinder or Bumble. There’s no paperwork to file to get entered into a database to be adopted, like getting medical insurance or joining the army.

Are you under the age of 18 (in the United States)? Will your parents voluntarily agree to give up their legal rights as parents? If not, then your options are limited.

You would need to be in circumstances where the state would step in and initial termination proceedings. I wouldn’t wish any of that upon you. Nor would I wish for you to seek it out.

But if you are in a situation where someone in your home is hurting you, you should act. If someone is hurting others in your home, you should act. In a situation where you are hungry, you aren’t safe, you are being exposed to drugs or drug use, or domestic violence, you need to get help.

One way to start this process would be to make a report to the local child services agency. Tell them truthfully what is going on. I can’t speak for every agency, but in most cases, these reports are confidential.

You could also talk to anyone who is a “mandatory reporter” for child neglect or abuse. This includes social workers, teachers, and principals. It also includes doctors, nurses, therapists, and child care providers. Lawyers and police officers also have this duty. These individuals could make the report to initiate an investigation by the local child protective services agency.


If you are under the age of majority (meaning not an adult), there isn’t really a process to put yourself up for adoption, not really. The best way to get the process started is to get the state involved somehow, and hope that they’ll initiate the termination process.

In any case, if you are in a situation where you aren’t safe, or someone is hurting you, seek help from people you trust.

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